Ella wants a change

Ella wanted a little change of her own. Here is her new haircut, we love it.

Im outta' here!!!

3 days. No kids. Best friends. Apostles. Spiritually uplifted. Amazing classes. Flight by myself. Holding brand new Sarah Jane, eating goodies, nice Hotel, sleeping in, late night girl talk, beautiful weather.
Women's Conference here I come.
Dave, you are the best Husband. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

Lessons

Having a child who has Autism has taught me a lot. Im stubborn and I can be selfish. I think Heavenly Father knew he had to send me Luke so that I could learn somethings I'd have otherwise not learned.

Initially it all felt like a daunting task. Something I could never do. There were days I barley made it through. Days where I cried and felt like an absolute failure. There have been many times where I had to re-adjust. Pick myself back up and try again. I knew if I could make it through that day we could start all over again the next. There was no manual that came with Luke's diagnosis. I was learning through trial and error on a daily basis.

What I wasn't prepared for was how amazing this little boy would be. He taught me about perseverance and hard work. He taught me that he could smash to bits the limitations I put on him. He taught me the joy of goals and the beauty of surpassing them. That as a Parent I could be a force to reckon with. He taught me how strong I was and what I could do when it came to helping and protecting my Children. Luke has taught me patience and pause. I have known amazement in ways I could never imagine.

Luke teaches me. Everyday. And I am so grateful for him. I am a better person for being his Mother.

7 months old

This little beauty is 7 months old today. What!? Where is time going? Luckily she is still just a few ounces over 13 lbs. (13.09 as of today) so its still sort of like she's my 4 month old.

What she's been up to-

loves to play with toys
good at sitting up
shares smiles with anyone and everyone
loves being outside
now says "Mama" when she wakes up in the morning, from naps or when I put her down. I know it sounds crazy but I swear she knows what she's saying.
babbles "Dada" now
loves her siblings. Ella is her new favorite person to watch and laugh at this month
has a great time splashing in the tub and getting mommy wet
loves her baby food and Gerber puffs
rolls all over the room to get moving where she wants to go
starting to drag herself a little
will finally watch a little Baby Einstein show once in a while


And as always sweet and good and the best baby in the World!!!

Mom's great idea

So its been a couple of days and here we are. Luke is still afraid. Not just afraid but terrified. And he's not just milking it or acting, he is more scared than I have ever seen him.

Last night he tried with all of his might but it just wasn't happening. He couldn't shake it as hard as he tried.So Dave ended up laying in bed with him until he fell asleep, again.

Tonight, same story. I even let him keep his light on and his door wide open. Didn't matter. After a while of horrified screaming, after I refused to lay with him until he slept, I had to give in. The last thing I need on my conscience is the idea that I have further traumatized my little boy. So I went back in. And I hugged him and kissed him and asked what I could do. He didn't know.

I finally got out of him that he was worried about his hands. Being able to see them at night was what it all came down to.

Amazing that Jumanji did this. And such an obscure moment. Not the Lion or the bad man with the gun. It was the boys hands as they were sucked into the game. I knew rationalization wasn't going to work with a 5 year old. I put myself in his shoes and thought. I asked him if it would help if he hid his hands under the blanket. It was a no-go, he said he could still feel them. Then it hit me. I ran downstairs and grabbed his Spiderman gloves.


We slipped them over his skinny little fingers and he smiled.

"Mom, I think this will work" He exclaimed. "I cant see my hands, they're hidden!"

I smiled at my cleverness, I admit. Hugged him, kissed him again and went downstairs.

And here we are, 20 minutes later. Not a peep. Not a sound. Thank goodness for a pair of gloves and a little imagination.


thanks for reminding me to snap a sleeping pic Julie.

not letting go

So I bought this delicious, its the only way to describe it, body wash the other day from Bath and Body works. I rarely go in there any more but I was with Luke and he's a big fan of all things scented. I knew he'd go completely nuts in this heaven for the nose so we hit it up. Right away his eyes lit up and we proceeded to smell everything. I mean it too, everything! It was like a candy store to someone like me or Ella.

I had no intention to purchase anything until we came upon the CO Bigelow line. Heavenly, simply heavenly. I couldn't leave the store without bringing a little bit home with us. And I did.

The thing is I almost never use it. Not because I don't like it, no way. And not because I still have another to empty. Simply put, I don't want to waste it. Doesn't that sound crazy? I know. The other day I was in the shower and I opened it, smelled it, closed the lid and proceeded to wash with my Dove body wash. Not nearly as luscious, I thought as I covered myself in the suds. After I got out I shook my head at the situation. Here I am trying to savor my pricey treat. I never buy this stuff for myself and I want it to last. But then I realize Dave is surly using it liberally, the kids have been thrilled to borrow it when I persuade them to shower. As soon as I got around to letting myself enjoy it there will be nothing left. Yet I still hesitate. 

So why do we put ourselves last? Why do the kids get new Summer clothes and sandals when our closet remains bare? Why do we eat last or sometimes not at all? I could go on and on. We know the questions and we certainly know the answers. But lets try harder. Put ourselves on our list, toward the top even. We need it and we  absolutely deserve it. 

I commit to using my new yet half empty body wash. If I treat myself a little more maybe I wont feel like it'll never come again.

**** side note, totally un-related. Dave just found out he has Mono. Awesome. Anyone want to help me clean my house now that he's out of the running? j/k*****

Going private

After watching an Oprah about child predators and distribution of stolen images of children, I have decided to go private. If you would like to be invited to read our family blog please send me your email address via comment or email. I hope you do.