Saturday, August 22, 2009

Stuck in the Middle

Ella is a middle child. She has a hard time deciding whether or not she wants to be big or little. And most days have a little of both rolled in. She is not the oldest, who gets to do everything first and receives the attention for doing so. Everything Luke does is new and exciting. By the time Ella does them I can sense that we just dont quite have the same enthusiasm as we did the first time around. Ella is not the youngest, who gets attention for being little and sweet and cute. Every time Olivia does something she gets ooooh's and aaaah's . And frequently Ella will try to do something similar but a 3 1/2 year old bopping her head to some fun music is just not the same as a 10 month old doing it.

I can tell that this little girl feels stuck. I can sense that she's trying to figure out who she is and what she wants to be doing. She's lost somewhere between a Kindergartner and a baby and I feel like I am overlooking her among the excitement of those 2 things.

So what do I do? How can I help her to know how important she is to us all? She makes us better and brighter and more exciting. She has a role all her own and I dont want her to feel lost in the middle, trying to fit into some one else's shoes.

I love you sweet Ella. I know sometimes things feel frustrating and confusing. I know you want more attention than you can manage to get. But I hope you always know how wonderful and beautiful and fun and thoughtful you are. I can not even begin to tell you how you can put smiles on my face in ways no body else ever could.


Ella with one of her favorite people, also a middle child, Uncle Ryan. I love this picture because its so clear how much they love each other.


Kim Harvey said...

I love those two middle children so much!

Rebecca D. said...

I have a special place in my heart for middle children!!! Stuck in the middle means so much and it will mean more the older she gets!!!They seem to end up being the peace keepers and the calming spirit in a home!

Whitney said...

I am a middle child as well, and I read this article and it helped me understand a lot about the issues some of us middle children struggle with. .

No matter what I know Ella will feel loved by her family!

Megan McCrindle said...

Maybe she will be like her mommy and swoop in on the spotlight! Us youngest children are usually pretty passive, as I suspect Olivia will be based on her mellow personality so far. She will most likely idolize Ella and let her steal the show!

Montana Wilkins said...

Ella will get to do all the "oldest daughter" things first and Olivia will be wanting to be just like her.
Middle child stuff always makes me think of a story I read in school when I was in about 1st grade called, "The One in the Middle is the Green Kangaroo." Not sure if it's even available anymore, but it's cute!

Brad said...

Ness and I are both the 2nd of 5, so that has been fun because we are middle and older. You probably just need more kids to help Ella get more firsts and balance it all out. :)

Although, you're now outnumbered with kids to parents, the times I got one on one with my parents are still some of the best memories of my childhood. Whether it was going on a "business" trip with my Dad, when we ended up camping and driving together over 500 miles for some purpose I was never quite sure of or my mom taking me into the MTC and spending a few days around SLC together before I reported.

Baby Olivia

Baby Olivia
bright eyes

My funny Ella

My funny Ella

My handsome Luke

My handsome Luke